Murphy's Laws
by crazyness101
Summary: A series of one shots concering the famous Murphy's Laws. Set in the 5-0 universe.
1. Chapter 1

**This is a series of one-shots I'm writing about Murphy's Laws in the 5-0 universe. They will be updated when I have the time and ideas. It will never be fully completed. Please review. **

Police Laws 

_The bigger they are, the harder they fall. They punch, kick, and choke harder too. _

Detective Danny Williams was once again following his partner, former SEAL Lieutenant Commander Steve McGarette into a firefight with only him as his back up. Following right behind Steve as they rounded as corner of a warehouse where a group of drug runners and their dealers were holed up, ready to fight their way out and hopefully take out the 5-0 officers on their way. Steve stopped at the entrances of two hallways leading into different directions. Waving his hands to indicate that he would take the left one, Danny moved up next to Steve and bumped his shoulder against his as he accepted the extra magazine that Steve held out to him. Steve rubbed the back of his hand against Danny's hand as he released the magazine. Moving down the right hallway Steve stayed close to the side, listening to the sound of Danny's footsteps as they faded away. Continuing down the hallway as it came to an end with a door, Steve opened the door to a set of stairs leading up to a second level. Opening the door at the top, he eased his way around the side keeping low to the ground, in case anyone noticed him and started shooting at him and trying to kill him, again.

Moving to the edge of the catwalk that was wrapped around the room, Steve glanced down noticing that the dealers were in the middle of the room. The sounds of them planning to escape were easy enough to hear, they weren't even trying to really keep their voices down. Following the catwalk around the room Steve froze as he noticed movement out of the corner of his eye. Danny was crouching behind a stack of crates with his gun aimed at the group. Pulling out his cell phone Steve messaged to Danny to start shooting on his signal. When his phone vibrated Danny jumped slightly, pulling it out and glancing around after he read it, Danny noticed Steve crouching up on the catwalk above his head, Danny calmly raised his hand and flipped him off. Laughing to himself Steve used his hand to gesture from them to the bad guys while raising all five fingers before lowering them, one after another.

When the final finger was lowered Steve started shooting the dealers, immediately he killed three of them. Running up to the edge of the catwalk, Steve grabbed a chain attached to the celling and threw himself over the side, using the chain to control his descent to the ground. While Steve was getting down from the catwalk Danny dropped two of the dealers and wounded two more. Hitting the ground in a crouch, Steve fired and hit one of the men Danny had wounded and killed him. Seeing Danny placing the other wounded suspect under arrest, Steve looked around accessing the damage and the body count. Turning he didn't duck fast enough as a fist came from behind him, hitting him the side of his face and sending him crashing into a set of crates.

Attempting to stand Steve jerked as the assailant grabbed his throat from behind him and started squeezing trying to crush his wind pipe. Grabbing hold of the arms around his throat Steve flipped the man on to his back, unable to doge as the man still had a hold of his throat the kick that he sent caught him in the upper chest tossing him five feet away. Feeling the wind get knocked out of him Steve didn't get up in time to meet the kick the dealer had drove into his ribs with all his might, cracking some of them. When he lifted his leg back to kick him again Danny appeared beside him with his claspable baton out and sent it crashing against the dealers jaw and check knocking him out on impact. The dealer crashed to the ground next to Steve who immediately drove his fist into the other side of his face in revenge.

"Damn Super Seal, you got your ass kicked."

"Danno did you see the size of him? He had at least six inches and probably eighty pounds on me, he was built like a freaking tank."

"Welcome to the world of the short people Steven."

"You just got your ass kicked by a gigantism tank human combo, I the amazing detective had to come save the Super Seal hide. I can't wait to tell this to Chin and Kono."

Do and die. Bye the way how did you know that your hit would knock him out with a single blow like that, it mostly take two or three blows in my experience."

"You, McGarette are a giant kid, have you never not been one of the tallest people around? Anyone who has spent time fighting people who sometimes are half a foot taller than them learn the weak spots of being tall real quick and the fast way to knock them out and on their ass. Just like that."

"Danno you got to how me how to do that."

"We'd have to find another giant."

"We have a volunteer right here."

"The governor won't appreciate it."

"Full means and immunity, this is a training purpose to make us more experienced cops and enable us to better catch criminals."

"No you just want revenge."

"That too."

"You're a bad influence on Kono."

"So were doing it?"

"Ya it's been a while since I've been able to use my nap tap."

"Is that whats it called."

"Yep and ill use it one you if you don't let me drive my own damn car."

"Keeper of the keys drives."

"Really, we're going there?"

"Book'em Danno."


	2. Chapter 2

Police Laws

_Dogs do not see the badge as a person of authority, they see lunch. _

Danny cased after a running suspect who decided upon sighting the two 5-0 partners, that he and his friend needed to hall ass as far away from them as possible. Leaving Steve to deal with the partner who had run into the crowded street, Danny's suspect had gone down a set of alleyways and through an entrance of a junkyard, trying to hide among the stacks of cars and other trash and debris. Following, as he moved deeper into the stacks of cars and piles of other trash, Danny lost sight of his prey and followed the sounds of his wheezing breaths and the sounds of his footsteps among the pathways. Hearing a short shriek and a growling snarl, Danny pulled out his gun as he rounded another stack of cars before sliding to a stop at the sight of humongous Rottweiler crouched over his suspect who was passed out flat on the ground. Clamping one hand over his mouth to try to cover his snort of amusement while the other held his gun, it didn't stop the sound from escaping and attracting the dog's attention. Freezing as the rott's head swung straight to face him, Danny did his best to keep his body language none threating, and to indicate that he wasn't edible or a threat. Seeing the dog abandoned his suspect to come charging at him Danny swore and swung his gun to aim at the dog, before jumping to the slide as the dog had closed to fast for him to get a shot off. Dropping the gun as he climbed to his feet because the dog slammed into his slide, Danny slammed his fist into its face when the dog lunged for his arm. Rolling away from the dog and getting to his feet, Danny ran to one of stacks of cars and jumped on the hood of the bottom one and used it as a stepping stool to help him climb up the rest of the way. Grabbing the door of the Cadillac on top of the pile Danny used it to help pull himself through the window as the Rottweiler jumped on top of one of the car hoods and lunged for his foot. Hearing the thump and yelp when the dog fell back down and hit the edge of the hood before falling on the ground Danny glanced back out of the window. Laughing at the looked of sheer shock on the dog's face as it stood back up and shook off the dust.

"What'ch going to do now puppy? Not so big and tough when you can't reach me now are you?" Watching as the dog backed up and took a running leap at the stack of cars again trying to get to Danny. Again the dog fell back to the ground unable to reach him.

"And the doggy fails again, what shall he do next? Learn to fly? Because that's the only way you're getting up here dog."

"Having some issues Danno?" Swearing as he jumped and cracked his head against the roof of the car, Danny turned his head to look at Steve who was standing at the beginning of the row, leaning against a pole with his arms crossed.

"Dammit Steven what's wrong with you? Don't you notice the man-eating beast in front of trying to eat me?"

"Really he's a man eating beast Danno?"

"Don't play stupid with me Rambo, he's craving Jersey Detective. Go get animal control, the air force, your army buddies."

"Navy Danno, I was Navy. That's why I'm called a SEAL. And he's craving Jersey meat huh?"

"Ya, he's tired of all the pineapple infected meat here. Dog's got good taste."

"So you're saying I should follow the dog's actions and eat Jersey meat?" Watching as the dog turned to face him Steve stayed came as it lowed his head and inched forward. Growling the dog started walking toward his Steve gripped the rock he had hidden behind his back in his right hand.

"Sit dog." Ignoring him the dog kept moving forward growling at Steve.

"Steven if you get eaten by this dog I'll never let you live it down, and I'll have the BAMF twin revive you so that I may kick your ass, and then they will kick your ass. So that you could learn your lesson, dogs eat people."

"Is this like the coconut rant?"

"Rant, Rant? It is an honest worry?"

"Mother hen. Now Dog SIT." Sighing as the dog bunched his muscles to start running at him, Steve threw the rock at the dog send it into the dogs muzzle casing it to yelp and start rubbing at its muzzle.

"Now let's try this again. Sit dog." Whimpering the entire time the dog sat down and kept watching Steve as he approached him.

"Good boy." Rubbing the dog's head as he started wagging his tail and wiggle around underneath his hand Steve watched as Danny climbed down from the cars.

"So you are a dog whisper now? It must be because your part animal yourself?" Walking up to stand by Steve the dog didn't even notice as it was leaning against Steve as he was petting him.

"This is a good dog Danno."

"Good dog, Steven, this dog tried to eat me."

"But he caught our suspect."

"He probably gave him a heart attack."

"He should come home with us."

"No, Steven, just no."

"But Danno he's a stray."

"And how do you know that exactly?"

"Please Danno, I'll take care of him and feed him, walking him."

"No you won't I'll end up doing all the work while you reap the rewards." Groaning the suspect on the ground started to wake up; Steve left off petting the dog and bent down to cuff him as he fully woke up. While Steve was dealing with that the dog inched up against Danny's leg and started licking his hand. Sighing, Danny just knew he was going to drool all over his car.

**Let me know what you think, I was readin through the website of Murphy's Laws and I burst out laughing when I read it because I could just see this happening in real life. **

**-crazyness101 (PLease review)**


	3. Chapter 3

Military Police Laws 

_You'll find the suspect you want, when you're off duty and unarmed._

Danny had dropped Grace off at her school and was stopping to buy coffee and breakfast for the rest of the team before he meet up at the gun range to put in some target practice time, otherwise known as Steve got a new gun and wanted to show off time. Pulling into a front row parking spot, Danny smiled his good mood from the weekend was carrying over into a Monday morning, he climbed out of the Camaro and dusted off the dog hair that had transferred to him from the seat, hair that Cuddles had left when Steve had hidden him in the car to show off to Grace last night when they went to pick her up for a Sunday Bar-B-Q. Walking into the small corner coffee shop Danny placed his order and when he received his coffee and food he carried them over to the counter top to doctor they coffee to the teams taste, leaving Steve's straight black. The door behind

Danny opened with a chime as a white male standing about 6'2 with brown hair walked into the shop heading to the counter. Freezing with one hand automatically dropping for his gun, Danny's breath caught and he mentally swore, as he realized that his gun was still in the Camaro where he had placed it in the glove compartment when Gracie was with him, he hadn't grabbed it when he left the car. The man who just walked in was a suspect that 5-0 was investigating in regards for a triple homicide and a gun smuggling operation where he and his brother brought guns in and sold them to gangs all over the islands. A deal had gun wrong and his brother and a drug dealers and one of his minions and ended up dead, money and guns were missing from the scene. They had placed a BOLO out on one Julio Gonzo, and he had just walked into Danny's favorite coffee shop.

Keeping one eye on him as Danny felt around for his phone to call Steve for backup, his blood ran cold when the man turned to look at something in the display case causing his shirt to pull up showing a gun tucked into his waist band. Watching out of the corner of his eye as Julio started to get agitated when he stood in line. Danny stepped away from the counter with the Steve's coffee still in his hand. Sliding up beside the guy, he reached for the gun in his waist band. Quickly grabbing it Danny threw it into the garbage can behind the cash register, Julio jerked around and lunged for Danny, getting a face full of scalding hot coffee dropping him to the ground, screaming and crying while clawing at his face. Calmly pulling out at set of handcuffs from his back pocket, Danny grabbed his arm and pulled it around his back before grabbing the other one and doing the same.

"Julio Gonzo, you are under arrest for the murder, gun smuggling, and possession of drugs." Placing one foot on his back to keep him from moving, Danny pulled out his badge and showed it to the rest of the cowering customers. "Everything is under control people; you are not in any danger. I'm a member of 5-0 and I just arrested a criminal, that's all please go on with your day. Miss please do not touch the gun in the trash, I'll get it, in a minuet." Replacing his gun in his pocket, Danny finally pulled out his phone out and hit speed dial.

"Steve, I'm in the coffee shop, yes I know I'm late. Kono did not say she would eat me if I didn't bring food. Yes, I got food, I also got something else. Yes, I got coffee, but I also have something else, something we want. Try to guess. It's human, male, and had a gun. No, not a robber, no, not a kidnapper, its Julio Gonzo, yes take guy, come get him, gun practice can wait. By the way you need to buy yourself another cup of coffee he ruined yours."

Hanging up as Julio tried to roll over and started cussing him out Danny calmly reached down and smacked him over the head. "Shut up moron, this is your fault; you should've followed the law. Now you are a gift for my partner, he can't wait to see you. So if you don't want it to be worse for yourself I recommend you lay there and be quite. "

"Danno."

"Ah Steven, you have finally arrived, about time, did you take the long way here? Stop to get a bite to eat?" Cuddles walked out from behind Steve and approached Julio lying on the floor, before laying down right in front of his head, with his teeth bared and a low growing rumbling in his chest.

"And you bring Jaws with you."

"His names not Jaws Danno, Grace said its Cuddles or Mr. Fluffy and I will never own a dog called Mr. Fluffy."

"So you would rather own a dog called Cuddles."

"He is cuddly."

"Only to you babe."

"I'll cuddle you if you're feeling lonely Danno."

"Just get the criminal in the car Rambo."

"So its settled cuddles at my place after work tonight."

"When did I say that?" Ignoring Danny as he waved his arms at him Steve bent down and haled Julio to his feet and started dragging him to his truck with Cuddles right behind him snapping at Julio's heels.

"And you just walk off. Well don't worry about me I'll just grab the gun and food and meet you at the office." Cuddles came back into the shop and sat at his feet at the mention of food.

"So now you like me."


End file.
